Trying to communicate with your ex might be something that you dread, but it’s necessary when you have a child together. The way you communicate with your ex can directly influence how the conversation goes.
Keeping things clear, respectful and focused on the child is key when communicating with your ex. This can help to keep the stress down so that you can provide your children with more stability.
Keep the focus on your child
Your child should always be at the center of conversations with your ex. You can’t ever focus on the contention between you and your ex. When you’re discussing anything that has to do with the children, start off with what’s best for the child. Leave your own feelings and emotions out of the situation.
Stay calm and respectful
It’s easy to let emotions overwhelm you when you’re talking to your ex. Be sure that you don’t let those emotions lead. Instead, remain calm and respectful throughout these conversations. You can always vent to a trusted friend later if you’re still upset.
Use written communication when needed
Some people can’t talk to their ex through a verbal conversation. If this is what’s going on with you, try using text, email or another form of written communication. This is often ideal for when there needs to be a record of the conversation.
Don’t vent on social media
Never vent about your ex or the child custody matter on social media because these posts can be used in custody proceedings. Even if you delete something, there can still be a record of it if someone took a screenshot of it. In some cases, your ex may get hold of that screenshot.
Productive communication is one of the cornerstones of a co-parenting relationship. It may be beneficial to get the parenting plan together quickly so both parents have the terms to provide direction about what’s allowable and what’s not. Getting this document together may not be simple, so it may be necessary to work with someone familiar with these matters.
