Sharing time with your kids is not easy to do during a divorce. You and your spouse want to celebrate the holidays with your kids and be there on their birthdays to make them memorable and fun. You may have strong feelings about your ex’s behavior during your relationship and may have a negative view of them because of their failings as a romantic partner.
Sometimes, people let the relationship with the other parent influence how they address specific issues in a divorce. Emotional decision-making may lead to people fighting for longer than they should or making demands that the courts will not likely grant.
Becoming too adversarial toward your ex as you prepare for custody litigation could actually hurt your chances of a favorable outcome.
How the New Hampshire courts decide custody
If parents don’t find a way to settle custody disputes directly, then they will go to court and ask for the help of a judge. A New Hampshire family law judge will need to learn about the family and then apply state law to the custody decisions that they make.
The best interests of the children are what matter the most in custody matters, and there are numerous factors that influence what would be in a child’s best interests. For example, the ability of a parent to meet the child’s basic needs and their relationship with the child influences how a judge divides parenting time.
A judge will also look at how supportive each parent is of the other and their willingness to cooperate in shared custody arrangements. If either parent makes an effort to manipulate how the children view the other parent or to push their ex out of the family altogether, that may influence what the courts ultimately decide about custody.
Judges want parents to cooperate, not fight
Someone who asks for sole custody without a sound reason for doing so will make themselves look bad to the courts. Refusing to let the other parent spend time with the children or even connect their phone calls to the kids can also make someone look like a parent who puts their emotional grudges above what is best for the kids.
Trying to keep the focus on your children can help you avoid mistakes early in the divorce that can harm your custody case. You can also keep careful records of when your ex says or does things that imply they seek to disrupt your relationship with the children. Learning more about what guides the decisions about custody in New Hampshire divorces will help families plan for upcoming court proceedings.