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Is your spouse making plans to leave?

On Behalf of | Jan 17, 2020 | Family Law

Like many New Hampshire couples, you may have struggled through the previous year with feelings of disappointment and disillusionment. Perhaps you even made resolutions to go to counseling or to find other ways to improve your relationship with your spouse.

Unfortunately, your spouse may not be on the same page as you. In fact, you may be noticing some unusual behavior that makes you wonder if your spouse has already decided to divorce. If this is true, you will want protect yourself and your future.

Red flags

Divorce is never a surprise for both spouses. One spouse usually considers leaving the marriage sometimes years before starting the process. This often leaves the other spouse confused and floundering, making mistakes when emotions are running high. Sometimes the signs that a spouse is ready to end the marriage are right in front of you, but you don’t recognize them for what they are. Examples of this include the following:

  • Is your spouse suddenly secretive about his or her online activities, such as deleting browser history or changing passwords?
  • Is your spouse lately taking more interest in the family finances, complaining about utility bills, suggesting your separate your accounts or urging you to increase your income?
  • Have you noticed that your spouse is not interested in planning events you used to enjoy, such as vacations or holidays?
  • Is your spouse hinting that he or she wants to sell the house?
  • Is your spouse becoming more focused on his or her physical appearance, clothing and image?
  • Is your spouse suddenly a model parent, spending more time and effort on the children, which may suggest your spouse is preparing for a custody battle?
  • Are you having trouble finding certain documents related to your joint assets, or are you noticing that you have less access to the mail or information about your finances?

For many, the obvious sign that a spouse is contemplating divorce is that he or she no longer shows affection or interest in you. While there may be many reasons for a spouse to withdraw, an obvious lack of intimacy, expressions of love, conversations or even arguments combined with any of the above may be red flags that your spouse is apathetic toward the marriage.

You may want to do whatever you can to save your marriage, and rightly so. However, it could prove invaluable to learn as much as you can about how to protect yourself legally if your spouse has already made a decision to leave.


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